well yesterday was my birthday, anyone care to ask what i recived? no? well i dun give a fuck, all i got was absolutley nothing, no happy birthday, no special lil treat for dinner, nothing. all i got was a threat that if i kept on acting moody and depressed that i would be basically disowned.
^-^ well i feel better now, feel free to comment if you wish

ok so here's the scoop, I have the local dev art rig, *meaning: high bandwith net connection, scanner, and an assload o' spare time* so much art will not be my own, READ THE DESCRIPTIONS! anyway i hope you all enjoy my lil corner of art goodness^-^

haloweeen! ok so i'm posting haloween pics up on here on scraps, and i wanr you that my costume is not for the faint of heart...

update time...
kelsie and i both are feeling shitloads better, i've made friends, i've destroyed friendships... meh
i'm posting pics meh

last night was a true ordeal, for my friend kelsie, and for myself
This is my first journal entry so i am going to give you all some backround information... i am:
6'
165 pounds
male
brown haired
brown eyed
gay
an empath

Yesterday we were having my 16th birthday party, playing paintball with two of my friends. Kelsie and Ari. We had fun, and we all got hit, the paint was white so it kinda looked inapropriate. After playing paintball, we ate some fast food and dropped off Ari. Kelsie and i were going to watch "Cube" a really freaky sci-fi movie. but something else happened.

She had recently broken up with her boyfriend, and two weeks after she had broken up (last night) she finally let it out. Her feelings swept over me like waves of ice cold acid, cold, burning, deadly. Because I am an empath, i can feel about 1/3 of how a person feels. and her feelings made me feel so hollow, so empty, like a wax doll.

I cherish all life, even people i truly hate I don't want dead. she made me want to kill myself, and her ex. This feeling was a very disturbing one. The only person I had ever truly wanted dead before this time was someone who was in so much pain that keeping her on life support was much worse than death. she felt pain even when on the maximum doses of painmeds. My poor grandmother shouldn't have lived like that not even for a week. They kept her on the life support for a year.

I listened to kelsie pouring out her soul.. and both her eyes, and mine were red from the tears. The tears had soaked the throw rug, and made a small pool they were so many. I am glad that she is dealing with it though... she almost never talks about her emotions and the fact that she is talking about them means she is on the road to getting better...

I continued to cry after she left and talked to my friends... at about 2pm, i finally stopped crying and began to feel better.

I thank you for reading, and i hope you try to help anyone in a similar situation Kelsie was in...

~the monarch of vespas